The most common question I'm asked by my female friends is "Why Are Guys Afraid Of Commitment?". I'm a perfect example of the guy who is afraid of commitment, so I figured I could shed some light on why some of us are afraid to commit:
He Still Wants to Play the Field
Once a guy commits, he will lose the right to date other women. Most guys try to hold on to this right as long as they can, especially when they are not sure what they are looking for.
Girls Grow Up Faster Than Boys
"Committing" means "growing up" to some guys. And a lot of us guys don't want to grow up, or we want to delay the process of growing up as long as possible, until we are absolutely ready. Commitment is a sign of maturity, and some guys are simply too immature to commit.
There's Someone Else
It's hard for a guy to commit to one woman if he's got others on his mind — imagine trying to commit if you had a couple of guys on your mind.
He's Has Other Priorities
In life, it's tough to balance love, family, work, etc. If there are things in his life that demand more attention than his love life, he'll commit to the other stuff and deal with love when he can.
He's Got Baggage/Afraid of Intimacy
We all know my head is messed up from my crazy family, my terrible experiences, and all of my mental downfalls. Maybe he's had a bad experience with a past girlfriend, or he's a child of divorce or never knew his father and his mom dated many guys and is still single. Unresolved pain in his past can prevent him from committing.
He's Afraid It Won't Work Out
Committing involves risk. You are essentially taking a plunge, and investing energy in the relationship. Some people feel that it's not worth a try unless it's 100% certain it will work out. But, you can never really be sure of things, and that unknown keeps some people from committing.
None of His Friends Have Committed
If you are able to get the first guy of his group of friends to commit, I commend you. Most of us guys want to commit eventually, but we don't want to be the first one, and there is respect among guys for the last single guy in the group.
He's Only in It for the Sex
Sadly, some guys are just out to mash women. Keep a close eye on things so you're not a victim of a sexual conquest. Females usually have a rule that they must be in a relationship before she has sex with a dude! Guys know that so they will say whatever they have to in order to get the booty.
He's Still "Selfish"
A few Months ago, my friend was freaking out via text because his girl scheduled a dinner the night of the Mayweather vs Canelo nationally televised PPV Fight. He was "extremely jealous" that I planned to hit the sports bar and watch the fight in HD. Committed relationships are acts of selflessness. We are giving ourselves and our time and energy to one another. I know that I'm still in a selfish period in my life: I'd rather wake up at 10 AM on Sunday and watch about NFL football all day, instead of waking up at 7 AM and going to church then brunch with a girlfriend. Some day we all get less selfish with our time, but when that occurs differs for everyone.
He's Not into You Enough to Commit
Most of the reasons a guy won't commit have to do with the guy. But he may see you as a fun person to date, but never thought of you as someone he'd commit to in the end. It's tough to swallow when this is the situation, but sometimes it's easy to resolve it in your mind this way and move on. Guys need a reason to commit and some females just don't have all the qualities a guy is looking for!
You're Pressuring Him Too Much to Commit
If he's going to commit, let him come to that moment on his own. If you continue to bring it up, he may become bitter and annoyed at the whole thought of it. You'd rather him come to the decision to commit naturally on his own, and not because he was pressured to do so anyway. Just think about how you feel when someone pressures you to commit.
Any combination of these reasons contribute to a guy's reluctance to committing. One of the biggest factors in the success of a relationship is timing. If you're out of synch in a relationship, and with commitment, then you may not be right for one another.
What reasons have you seen in your experience for guys not committing. Do you agree with my reasons?
"This has been another article by "Tha Cool Chronicles"
No comments:
Post a Comment
Leave Something