Me: “Let me play with it while you suck me.”
Her: No. You're nasty
Me: “Hang off the bed and suck my d*ck.”
Her: No.
Me: “Call me daddy while you bend over and touch your toes and I hit it from the back.”
Her: No.
Fuuuuuuck!!! That is the most annoying shit on the face of the Earth.
Last night while talking to a friend about "why females get cheated on" my good friend, porn star extraordinaire Samone Taylor said, “Niggas, Cheat because they chicks don’t want to get into the vibrators & the strip poles."
Ladies a man wants a freak in the bedroom on some nasty shit
Truer words have never been spoken. I believe women need to be more open about sex.
Be more Judy Winslow rather than Laura Winslow. Now I’m not saying leave your family to do porn like the younger sister from Family Matters did, but my girl should at least hit the head while I drive back after a night out at the club or on the town.
I just don’t want a boring chick, I want a sexual intellectual… Or a real freak as some of you call it. A lot of women think that once they become girlfriend, wife, or mother they no longer have to be the freaks they used to be to get the man in the beginning of the relationship.
That is the furthest thing from the truth. My woman better swallow cum and make bottles with the same ferocity or I am going to dip out on her. QUICK!!!
So to help those women bound by the straps of dull sex I’ve created a list of simple things women can do to be more of a freak when it comes to sex.
1. Say some nasty shit out loud. I urge all women to tell their man something sexual while at a restaurant, book store or where ever couples go. What she says doesn’t have to be extra freaky just sexual. But being extra freaky is an added bonus.
— When we get home climb on top of me and make love to me.
— You’re going to get head when we get home.
2. Do something out side of the bedroom. Give a hand job on the couch, blow him in the kitchen, or tell him to take it in the bathroom. Eventually, she’ll do something out side of the house and no longer be boring in the bedroom.
— Stop spitting, Start swallowing. For those women who absolutely cannot swallow she should tell her man where to cum.
3. Remove the word “NO” from your vocabulary. While i would love for women to Submit 100% because there is nothing better than a submissive women. Just removing the word no can give that appearance.
— Instead of no, suggest something else. A woman who is willing to give up everything when it comes to sex is my favorite kind of woman.
4. Invest in toys. Sex products do nothing but enhance the sexual experience. Whether its experimenting with a new one or incorporating in an old one, they help. Strip poles and vibrators are your friend.
— Sex toys help with the imagination, the innovation, and the excitement of sex. And what woman doesn't want to increase her pleasure?
5. Spontaneity! I cannot stress this enough, men don't want to have to ask for sex, sometimes we just want out women to pull our dicks out and get it poppin without warning
—There is nothing more sexy than a woman who takes control of a situation without warning. Take him into the dressing room and suck his dick, give him a little pussy on his lunch break. Trust me when I say it will work wonders and leave him with less wonders about the next chick
6. Make It Nasty! Be his personal porn star, His Slut, His Nasty Bitch, or whatever else freaky he wants you to be. Don't be afraid to use spit on his dick, suck his balls, etc. If you think your parents would be embarrassed to know you do certain sexual acts then you know that's what he wants you to do.
I could go on and on but why bother because you ladies aren't gonna take this advice anyway. But it was fun writing it. If you have any remarks please feel free to add them.
But it's been my pleasure to share my thoughts with y'all this public service announcement has been brought to you by "Tha Cool Chronicles"
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